Three Mindsets Keeping You Stuck

You have dreams, right? You have goals—we all do. But for some reason, it always seems like you’re spinning your wheels with no forward progress. You can’t figure out how to get traction, and end up finding yourself sitting in a big pile of frustration. Guess what? You’re not alone. So many of us experience the same challenges and can’t figure out exactly why. 

Luckily, it’s simple. It all comes backdown to mindset. 

All of us can move toward our best lives when we start eliminating the things that keep us stuck. When you’re feeling stuck, chances are one of these three mindsets are probably the culprit: 

1. Comparison

It’s so easy. Getting lost for hours scrolling through your social media feed, all the while telling yourself that the people you see in those perfectly curated squares have it all together. It’s easy to assume one thing: Their lives are perfect. Wrong. Believe me, they’re not. 

Social media has a way of making the lives you see pictured in these squares absolutely perfect. It just looks like it. The minute you start comparing your real life to those you see on the screen, you are robbing yourself of joy. Not only that, you’re also robbing yourself of motivation and creativity. Here’s the bottom line: You be you. Do it yourway. Stay in your lane and focus on your goals, not your neighbor’s. 

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2. Perfectionism

The idea of perfectionism tells us that we are never enough. We are never enough. So, we keep pushing the bar higher and higher until we reach “it.” And when we reach this level of perfectionism we’ve been striving for, we end up pushing the bar even higher.  

Perfectionists believe there is a right way and a wrong way to do just about everything. “Shoulds” begin to lead the narrative of our minds and tell us that perfection is attainable. (Spoiler alert-— it’s not). Perfectionism is actually a roadblock to success, not a path. It paralyzes us and eventually moves us towards procrastination, rather than action. Listen closely: Success actually comes from repeated failures, not from getting it right the first time.


3. Defeatism

When we live with the mindset of defeat, we’re essentially giving up before we ever begin. We have a dream, but it’s not realistic. We have a goal, but we’re not sure where to begin. We have a problem, and it seems too difficult to solve. Hope is lost, confidence is lacking, and our inner critic eventually wins. But we can’t let defeatism take over our lives.

Famous Green Bay Packers football coach, Vince Lombardi said, “You defeat defeatism with confidence.” Confidence is built every time we step out in risk and vulnerability and realize that we are actually okay. 

If you struggle with one or more of these mindsets, I encourage you to consider a new path. You were created to live in freedom, using your unique talents and gifts. You were made to shine . . . I believe in you!

 
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Kim Anderson is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC-MHSP) and a Certified Life Professional Coach (CPLC) who loves helping others live their lives with passion and purpose. She lives with her husband and two teenagers outside of Nashville, in Franklin, Tennessee, where she loves seasons, rolling hills, and the warmth of the South. Follow Kim at www.kimanderson.life, on Instagram @kim_anderson_life, and on Facebook@ KimAndersonLifeCoachingto learn more about what she offers.

 
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